#17

Safe & Sound <3

omg. hello. it's been 2 years since i posted?! what can i say...life has been good. i have never been better, in this moment of peace and happiness, that seems never-ending as of recent. i am so thankful/full of gratitude. i get to live with the love of my life, share our life together, and have all the time right now to focus on me and what i love, what i want to do in this life of mine. i turned 30 this year, and i feel like for the first time i truly love myself, feel confident in myself...it's such a foreign feeling in many ways, but it feels like a long time coming. i'm just chilling right now, and i'm content with it. reading past posts, i was so stressed about making something out of myself, being "productive" for society...right now I'm not worried about any of it. and i know i'm lucky to be able to say that, and live that. today, for the first time, i picked up a book i bought probably over a year ago now, and i began reading again. it's such a good book, called "a song to drown rivers". when i first started over a year ago, i wasn't feeling it too much. idk what changed, but i'm really enjoying the read, and absorbed in the story. also, i must type this out, for the past couple months, i've been really proud of myself. i've began a routine of working out/exercising and eating healthy, and i've been consistent for several months now. i feel the changes, mentally and physically, and it's a wonderful feeling. i feel strong, beautiful, and just unstoppable. i'm me, and i really love it, for maybe the first time in so long. life hasn't been perfect, there's been many hardships, struggles, and sadness along the way, but overall this journey has been so worthwhile. i've continued to learn a lot over these past 2 years. my main takeaway message for tonight, and for life honestly, is to love wholeheartedly and deeply. so deeply. to always love hard, love the ones close to me, and even the ones i briefly encounter in this life. that is my purpose in this life. to love. i'll be back again hopefully sooner than last time, journal. 'til next time. <3

#16

Happiness :)

It's been many months, perhaps even a year, since I last posted. So much has changed. I'm working as a behavior therapist for children with autism (clinical), which has always been one of my dreams careers wise. I have a super loving boyfriend, one who shows me how loving and caring he is and is everything I've always wanted in a man. I am reading again, after going to the library with my boyfriend and deciding to download the library app on my phone, I found a book I really liked. Got hooked on it, and my boyfriend went out of his way to buy me the second, third, and fourth book in the series so that I can get my reading on. It's such a good book and I love him. There's so much more I can say, but for now I'll end with this: happiness finds you when you least expect it, after you've gone through so much bullshit. It wasn't all for nothing. <3